Saturday, December 6, 2014

Santa-Free Zone

My family does not and will not do Santa for Christmas. Before I go into why, let me give you some background. Whether or not to do Santa was the ONLY thing Rusty and I didn't agree on when we got married. We knew we would have to make a decision at some point, but decided to shelve the issue for a later date. Rusty was raised in a Santa-believing household and I was not.

Now that we have Adam, that decision had to be made. After much discussion, Rusty decided (whether he agrees or just wants to please me) to not have our child believe in Santa.

There are two sides. First, you are lying to your child and everyone else is in on it. Everyone I've talked with remembers the exact moment they realized Santa wasn't real - and it was heartbreaking. I even know people who pretended that they still believed even when they didn't because they wanted to still get presents or didn't want to disappoint their parents. Not only did their parents lie to them, but the child now felt it was okay to lie right back, and why wouldn't they? If you lie to your children, they learn that it is okay to lie to you, but also, they will begin to question the validity of everything else you say, in the past and in the future. When I tell my son something, I want him to be able to know without a doubt that what I say is true. I'm a true believer that relationships are based in truth - any relationship. How is it fair for you to tell your child to be truthful and turn around and lie to them?

Second, I am a firm believer in Jesus Christ. I realize that he was most likely born in the Spring or Summer, not in December, and that the Wise Men didn't visit him until he was a toddler, but this is when he is celebrated. I want Adam to know that we celebrate the birth of Christ, not a jolly fat guy delivering gifts. At the same time, I will spend all of Adam's childhood teaching him about an entity that he cannot see, who's all knowing but whom you can still feel. I can't teach him those traits about God and about Santa and then turn around and say, oh, but one of them is not real. Why would he believe either is? I know some of you will say you do Santa, but your child knows the true meaning of Christmas. Sure, your child knows that Jesus was born and we're celebrating his birth - but is hard for me to believe that they are not more focused on Santa.

Am I telling you not to do Santa? Of course not; as a parent, that is your prerogative and I don't ask for you to tell me how to parent so I won't tell you. However, I do wonder why people don't treat Santa as fiction. Tell your child he is pretend, make-believe or fiction. I'm not sure why our society treats him as a real person until our kids wise up, especially when children start to use critical thinking about it and the logistics and parents cover up the original lie with more lies to try and make everything make sense.

Our Christmas won't be any less than yours. My child will still wake up excited (when he is not an infant) to see the presents. He will get excited to see the lights, to make the cookies, to see family. Christmas will still be a fantastic holiday for him, even without Santa.

Don't get me started on a creepy elf that does naughty things, but that is supposed to watch to make sure you don't.

I encourage your point of views. Agree with me, argue with me, but bring me logic.

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